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The First Poem Since...

Artwork by L.Ross

surrounded by love
i do not know
how to give to myself

no walk through a pained psyche
no citing of childhood wrongs 
the past be the past be the past

this belongs to Idgie on the mountaintop
crippled hip giving Sphinx-like form
she lays with a regality no one will see is forced
Idgie hobbles only when in motion
Idgie and I know each other best
know the best love
because our pain is outside

Tallulah laps us up
The shell and the actress herd us
knead us into taking care of ourselves
Idgie and I eager for the instruction
for the love note in it
as we sit in our regal positions
and deny ourselves.

what is it
causing self-abnegation
what is it
makes us worthy of God's good grace
beautiful gray and white and oh so black Tallulah
small potbellied limber yogi moon

i shift focus 
let the ama in my name speak
leave the computer idle
fill my ice trays
my knee needs cold, heat,
love time attention
and i owe my girls some good self-treatment
something that will show i understand 
the loving gleam
in all of their eyes.


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